Road Trip
by Rain-chan Darkened dream
Summary: 17 elves, one half elf, and two humans all on one V.W. bus on a road trip. please R&R! i beg!
1. Chapter 1

_A/N: this was originally a comic that evolved into a story. The transition is a little weird so bear with me. This should be a funny tory. The original character's names are Anaren, a half-elf and a human named Richard. Other characters will be introduced as we go along. This will have to read as a script. r&r or I'm deleting. I deleted one story because I only had one reveiw and it was negative, so if you like the story let me know._

narrator (James Earl Jones): the elves of Middle Earth have been kidnapped by the man to be studied for their immortality. But Anaren and her weird friend have scheduled a break out. And that is where their story begins.

Legolas: Okay! Let's roll!

Figwit: What the hell are you wearing?!

Legolas: It's a cat-suit!

Figwit: You look so gay!

Legolas: Says the dude in a dress!

_outside_

Richard: I'm bored! I could be playing World of Warcraft!

Anaren: Dude! Turn around!

(there is a building set on fire with a sign that reads,'this is a secret military base. you see nothing.' and the elves are running to the V.W. bus.)

Anaren:(once everyone is on the hippie bus) role call! Arwen?

Arwen: Here

Anaren: Check. Uncle Celeborn?

Celeborn: Yo!

Anaren: No. Check. Estel?

Aragorn: Here.

Richard: But that's Aragorn!

Anaren: Yes, but his elvish name is Estel.

Richard: He's human. What's he doing here?

Anaren: Aragorn just turned 88.

Richard: (slightly purturbed) uh...looking good?

Aragorn: uh...thank you?

Anaren: Check. Elladan and Elrohir?

Both(wearing shirts that say thing 1/thing 2): Here!

Richard: Which is which?

Anaren: i have no idea. Elrond?...Elrond? Elrond!

Galadriel: I guess he...uh...fell behind?

Anaren: Check. Erestor?

Eerestor: I am present.

Anaren: Check.


	2. Chapter 2

Anaren: Oh, goody. Check. Faelon?

Faelon: Present.

Anaren: Figwit?...Figwit? Legolas, where's Figwit?

Legolas: Who? (looks confused)

Anaren: You know who I'm talking about.

Legolas, No, I don't know anyone by that name.

Anaren: Okay, check. Galadriel is here...funny face-uh, i mean Galdor?

Galdor: Everyone's a critic.

Richard: Ha! He looks funny!

Anaren: Check. Gil-Galad?

Gil-Galad: (jumps up with a toy sword. he also looks 'slightly' crazy.) Fire the arrows! Hold your positions! Charge!

Anaren: Yea, you teach those orcs Gil-Galad.

Richard: What the hell? I thought Gil-Galad fell into darkness.\

Anaren: That basically means that he's lost it. During the final stand against Sauron, well Gil-Galad finally cracked. Any way! Glorfindel?

Glorfindel: THat's Lord Glorfindel, slayer of balrogs and-

Anaren: Yea yea yea. Haldir, Orophin, and Rumil?'

Haldir, Orophin, and Rumil: Here.

Anaren: Legolas?

Legolas: Here!

Anaren: Dude...the cat suit...why?

Legolas: Duh, it's awsome!

Anaren: Ok...Thranduil?

Thranduil: I still don't approve of you seeing my son.

Anaren: Really? My shrink says he has a very calming effect on me! (fakes spasism)

Thranduil: What the-?!

Anaren: That's everyone! Floor it, Richard!

Richard: I'm the fast and the furious!

(the bus pulls away, tires squeeling)

Elrond: (trying to catch up) Hey! (coughs) Wait up!


	3. Chapter 3

_A/N Okay, people. This story has gotten seven hits and not one reveiw. The Talk has 207 hits and three reveiws. CSI has twenty three hits and only three reveiws. What part of 'I will delete' don't you get? If you don't reveiw I assume that you hate it and that it's taking up space. Please people! Even if you don't like the story tell me how I can improve or what you want to see. Please! I need to know what you think! _

Anaren: ...and in the likely case of a crash, put your head between your knees and kiss your ass good-bye!

Thranduil: Did you say 'likely' occasion of a crash?

Anaren: This bus is being driven by a fourteen year old! I'll be surprised if we don't crash! Havo dad ar' diina! (sit down and shut up!)

_Three hours later_

Elladan and Elrohir: Are we there _yet_?

Richard: if you two don't shut the hell up, I'm letting the cops get you.

Elladan: But we're bored!

Richard: Deal. With. It.

_Five hours later, a little ahead of the bus,_

Forrest (my little brother): (refering to the smashed, burning '53 nash that i poured alot of my time into fixing up and painting the awsome dragon on) Oh, shit! Anaren's gonna kill us!

Nile (Forrest's best friend): Us? You're sadly mistaken. Anaren's gonna kill _you._

Forrest: Okay, don't worry, we'll just get a ride to the nearest town and ask them to fix this baby.

Nile: Hey look! There's a V.W. bus coming this way!

(Bus squeals to a stop.)

Forrest: That's Anaren's bus! Run!!!!!!! (slowly realizes that he isn't moving. Anaren is holing him by the back of his shirt) Uh, hi, sis.

Anaren: (sceaming) WHAT THE HELL DID YOU DO TO MY CAR????????!!!!!!!!!!

Forrest: Well, Nile and I went for a ride and then I wanted to find out what would happen if you put a lit match by an open gas line...well, you get the rest.

Anaren: Well, if I leave you here, Ma and Da will kill me...okay, you two come with us. But any trouble and i will set you ablaze. Got it?

Nile and Forrest nodd


	4. Chapter 4

_A/N Thank you to the two of you who reveiwed. Now to the other fifty-five, Why didn't you reveiw? I have to assume that only those two like the story. Please prove me wrong._

James Earl Jones:_ So, this brave fellowship was formed. The Fellowship of the V.W. bus. They took on all hardships as one. There journey was laden with toils...but their hardest test was about to begin..._

Forrest: STOP THE BUS!!!!!!

(tires squeal to a stop, beside two super model twins)

Tina: Hi! I'm, like, Tina.

Gina: And I'm, like Gina.

Tina: and, like, we're, like, going to, like, Hollywood, so, like, we can, like, be big stars! So could you, like, give us, like, a ride?

Arwen: How many times did Barbie over there say 'like'?

Anaren: (mocking)I, like, counted, like, seven.

Forrest: Yea! We'll give you a ride.

Richard: Maybe we should think about this for a second.

_one second later_

Richard: OKay, They can come.

_About an hour later:_


	5. Chapter 5

Narrator: With the addition of Tina and Gina, the minds of the males, elves and men, had suddenly had their attention spans slowly murdered. These temperesses were begining to grind into Anaren's nerves. She began plotting their down fall-

Anaren: Can it James Earl Jones!

James Earl Jones: Fine Be like that. But just remember, you hired me.

(everyone's on the bus.

Tina and Gina are oogling Legolas.

Legolas is not noticing.

Anaren is noticing and plotting the twins down fall)

Haldir:(pops up over the back of the seat.) Hi, my name's Haldir. I'm single and enjoy taking long walks on the beach, and I luv puppies because they're cute!

Anaren: Haldir can you be any more of a walking classified ad?

(Haldir sits down, embarrassed)

Gil-Galad: (holds up toy sword) I fight this battle for you, my ladies.

Anaren:(tazors Gil- Galad) Sit down while the bus is in motion!

Tina: But you're, like, standing.

Anaren: Yea, but I'm in charge, bimbo.

Tina: Whoa was that, like, an insult?

Anaren: uh...duh!(turns back to fellowship) now we must choose what dvd we are going to watch. We got, Robin Hood: Men in Tights, Night at the museum, or...Monty Python and the Holy Grail-'

Gina: Holy Grail is, like, for, like retards.

(tense silence)

Anaren: Out. Now.

Tina: Like, what if, like, we don't, like go.

Anaren:(smiles)

(shot of outside of bus)

(Tina and Gina are thrown out...literally)

Anaren: Drive. Now!

Tina: Hey! You can't like leave us here!

Anaren: Bye!


End file.
